Two goats go to the cinema. As they’re watching the movie one of the goats is chewing up a reel of film. Afterwards, as they’re leaving, the other goat asks,
“So how did you enjoy the film?”
“It was okay, but I preferred the book.”
This joke comes to you from Alma.
A Bad Guide 
OK, if we’re going to start telling silly film/book jokes, you have only yourself to blame.
This one I heard on the radio:
A man goes to the cinema. Next to him, there’s a man who’s brought his little dog. The film is very funny: the dog is laughing like a drain. The film gets sad: the dog is crying bitter tears. At the end od the film, the man says to the dog’s owner: “I’m really amazed by your dog.” The dog’s owner replies: “Me too, after all, he didn’t even like the book.”
Hats off to Alma.
Photoshop!
I bet that’s Misty, twice.
Yeah. What, you think I’m actually going to take them to the cinema?
Yeah, I hear goats have to pay full price in Norway.
Let the goats go, and they’d all want to go. This isn’t an orphanage.
They could canoodle in the one-and-nines.
I might have thought you were taking them to the movies if the signage hadn’t been in English. Alma’s joke, which I enjoyed, got me wondering about movies I’ve preferred over the books source material.
Aha, I should have written KINO, of course.
“Took a fishhead out to see a movie;
Didn’t have to pay to get it in.”
(Is this artifact well-known in these circles?)
Eat ’em up, yum!
I haven’t heard it before. It’s very soothing, I’m sure, for the first several-hundred times.
(Is this artifact well-known in these circles?)
It was a favorite at the Off the Wall Cinema in Cambridge, which specialized in shorts like those from Canada and Zagreb back in the day.
But you want the original Barnes and Barnes version. One of the Barnes (the one who takes the fish head to the movie, IIRC) is Bill Mumy, Will Robinson from Lost in Space, the boy who controlled everyone in the Twilight Zone episode “It’s a Good Life”, Lennier on Babylon 5, etc.
Here.
YouTube.
Well, here’s that version. I must say I prefer it. My daughter is going to like it, (she has pig-flu).
Curse you, I can’t get this song out of my head.
Fish heads. Fish heads. Roly poly. Fish heads.
ARRRRGGGGHHHHH.
Can you imagine Eric Satie’s Variation on a Theme in counterpoint to those little chipmunk voices?
Goats-&-Cinema shock-horror news.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/film/6412411/George-Clooneys-Men-Who-Stare-at-Goats-based-on-real-US-army-experiments.html
“You have to understand that these ideas were not considered wacky,” Sergeant Glenn Wheaton, a Special Forces soldier seconded to Project Jedi, told the Mail. “We also needed to know how to protect ourselves should they be used against us.”
Okay, just as long as they don’t think I’m wacky, I’m going outside to stare at our goats. We’ll see what happens.
No, forget it. It’s raining.
Um, are you sure? What if it works?
I’ve heard you can hypnotize a chicken by turning it upside down and then, while staring at it, backing away slowly into the infinite distance.
There was some famous pundit in my grandparents’ time who said, “We’re lucky we don’t get all the government we pay for.”
A classic example. Right away, Google tells us that it was said by Will Rogers, H. L. Mencken, Milton Friedman, Charles Kettering and Sol Schildhouse, the former head of the FCC’s Cable Television Bureau. The oldest reference I can find is from 1951 and to Kettering (thereby ruling out anything to do with cable). Doesn’t seem to be in the reliable quotation dictionaries.
Here attributed to Will Rogers (1879-1935), which is who I thought said it (my grandfather admired him):
http://books.google.com/books?id=ZtL6TM2SBYMC&pg=PA176&lpg=PA176&dq=We+ought+to+be+glad+we+don%27t+receive+as+much+government+as+we+pay+for&source=bl&ots=G7dBS9lyL-&sig=p-5MZOJ5uJrIp8FqnFwVSbN6_2o&hl=en&ei=0NbtSvbuBI-IMuaWyYQM&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CAgQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q=We%20ought%20to%20be%20glad%20we%20don%27t%20receive%20as%20much%20government%20as%20we%20pay%20for&f=false
I wonder how they source that stuff.
Here attributed to Will Rogers
Indeed it is, though a similar search finds books willing to ascribe it to Kettering.
Playing around with the wording finds this from 1949. The context isn’t completely clear, though it’s interesting that this volume appears to discuss an address by Kettering titled, “A Scientist Looks at Socialism”, but later in the volume, so the relationship isn’t immediately clear. The 1949 looks good, too, since search for 1950 (the usual way to find Google meta-data errors) only refers to next year’s outlook.
I wonder how they source that stuff.
Often not very carefully. Which is why one can only really trust ones like the Yale that specialize in tracking things down.
Oh, and though The businessman’s book of quotations (1951), from that first list, is no preview available, you can still tell that “Kettering” occurs on the same page (113).
My father was fond of Will Rogers too.
“Are you a member of an organised political party?”
“No, I’m a Democrat.”
[…] all have our limitations, but when we bend to our critics, we also have theirs." Robert Brault Goats in The Cinema. Hugging dusty bones against the autumn chill, I watch as squirrels scurry about seeking food for a […]